Friday, August 25, 2006

A Trip to Barnes and Noble

So this afternoon I went to Barnes and Noble. I did my usual swing through the Christian fiction section but didn't see anything that caught my attention (the usual lack of sci-fi/fantasy. Hopefully that will change soon!). I moved on to the regular sci-fi/fantasy section where I picked up Harry Turtledove's Settling Accounts: Drive to the East. I'll add it to the pile (which I think includes Kathy Tyer's Firebird trilogy and Karen Hancock's Legends of the Guardian King books).

On my way out, I went through the new books section and noticed the novel version of John Cena's upcoming movie, The Marine. Fair enough. It was what was sitting next to it that made me cringe:

Seriously. What the heck is this? Torrie Wilson holding a gun? Before I knew what was happening, the book was in my hand and I turned it over to read the back to see what this was about. This is what I learned:

December 2001: Vince McMahon steps out of a snowy night into a diner in upstate New York for a meeting with old friend Phil Thomson, now a highly placed government official. Thomson has a strange proposition: creating a new covert black-ops group using the Superstars of World Wrestling Entertainment. The WWE's talented men and women are perfect. Highly skilled athletes with the ideal cover, they travel all across the country and the globe; no one would find it unusual to find them in a town one day and gone the next. The government would train and support the wrestlers in every way possible except one: no one must know the truth.

March 2006: The Superstars have been handed their latest assignment -- take down a commercial-grade methyl-amphetamine plant that is bankrolling terrorist activities in Europe. Their mission seems simple and straightforward, until a member of their team is taken prisoner. Now all that they've worked so hard for is in jeopardy, and one of their own might be killed...

Seriously. I am not making this up. What scares me even more is the fact that people gave it such positive reviews. A few might be sarcastic, but really.

I guess the one nice thing about this fiasco is this: Yes, this travesty was published by WWE Books. But if this can get published, then I have to have a good shot. Heck, maybe they'll need some help with the sequel. Vince, call me!

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